SAdneZ slaYeR

it"S beeN ages

2005-02-27T20:07:00.000-08:00

since I last Updated this..almost forgoottten abt mi blog..haha..too bz le..
working and not forgetting,spending lotsa time with my dear..
he's goin to Ns soon..sad..
bUt..ALl these while,we REli enjoyed each other's company together ..n i noe we will continue to enjoy each other's company 4eva..haha..
weLL..we've been thru alot ..n i noe he has "suffered" alot cos i aM the *EvIl*PrincEss thatt bullIes her Humble Servant..haha..just joking..
we Juat sPend a VEri speCiaL month..the Month of Feb..
not onli is iT the month of the LunaR new yeaR,
its our 1st VALentine
1st BdaE celebrations (our bdae r just 4 days aparts,cn u belive it?haha}
TanTan's chinese bdaE..haha..
and alot more of coS,,,
worDs cant say out how much i wAnna tell u n how dEEp mi love is FEr u..my Beloved Darling Prince..this LAst day of fEb does not mark the eNd of our joy But ant Beginning That will DraW more happiness n BLiss..another Advancement of our relationship...
i hAD the happiEst bdae Eva this year,,but i noe the upcomings wil b even better ...cos my dear nvr runs out of idea to make mi happy..
he does not mind acting spastic just to drive away my unreasonably bad temper n anger..wheRe else can i find such a gooDy DeaR...
God ,i Cherish HIm..Him n HIm onli..HIm n him the MosT..
My DEar got Mi e couplE ring that i've long awaited for..haha..(engagement ring)?
A couplE shirt from DCp..
aLot ALot more..
most importantli,he gave mi wat $ couldn buy, his LOVEEEEEEEEeeeeeee..his DIvine loVE,,,
DeaRtHis is SPeciaLly dEDicated to u..Yes u--> my one n onli Buibui Tan AKa Table aKa mR tAn,,muacks

working Life

2004-12-23T20:14:00.000-08:00

hmm..curently working at SOny Chemical Corp..at CLemenceAu avE in River vallEy...near Liang COur or mohd sultan to b precise...evriday travelling to n fro takes 2 hours...hmm...Tiring..have to wake up at 630am..no difference frm sch..ops,ferget to mention.i am admin coordinator..mi company is a subsidiary of sony corp...n have plants in indonesia,batam etc...i am in charge of admin stuff..filing..faxing..copying..etc...sumtimes the filing makes mi go Bonkers...hahahah///but not bad la..i can use msn in office...(chocochair@yahoo.com.sg)...well...i work frm 830 to 530...lucky dec alot of half day...i am so tiRED>>.evriday WOrk *OT*11 plus then reach home..actucalli no la..is mi acc mi Tantan..n he acc mi..cum to fectch mi off work.. *most of the tome*...not all la..cus he got his own life also ma...we like amrried couple lidat..loxl....suddenli bcum so *old*waAHahahaha..ydate we went shoppin...1st time rELi went Shooppin wI him..so hAPPi...hehehehe...i woRk evridasy...so SIamz...long time nvR reli go shooppin..so ydate reli appi...then we walk home frm j8..so nice...then ydate was meimei's bdae...bought a shirt fer her,,...then tantan got help mi choose..hehehe..bought a bag fer tantan...thinks he like it..(how can he not like aniting i give him lehz?he not so *daring*...()hahahaha..yES..i am a BIG bULLy..but onli to TantAN...ahahahaha...lalala...aniwAy...hopE to have a vEry Enjoyable n unfeRgetable xMas this yr.,,1st XMas wif tAnTan wor..veri PRecious...1st xmaS b4 he goeS nS,,,then ydate he SAy the Pilot diV ask him go intErview..lolx..hope he Can maKEit...wAHahaha...ALl i Want fer xMAs is ---->UUUuuuuuuuu...Uuuuuuu n UUUUUUUuuu

part 2:9/12

2004-12-09T01:22:00.000-08:00

part 2:9/12(writing alll these secretli while i am working)hahah
tantan:thank u fer evriting...thanks fer realising mi *dReam*..n i noe we'll not onli realsie dreams in future but also build them....thanks fer loving mi like nvr b4 evriday..thanks fer fetching mi frm work..thanks 4 evriting...jusjus jus so mani tings...i am speechless now cos no words can express mi feelings 4 u...
THANK U TANX2,NINGX2 LOVE U ALWAYS

NEW!finalli!must sEE!haha

2004-12-09T01:13:00.000-08:00

been so long since i last updated///been reli bz...today i speciallly dedicate this page fer mi dearest *tantan*(tho i tink he'll not see this)
aniwaY..today is our Specail BIg day...3 months,,,
it's reli not eZ fer us to cum this *far*..so faRnie to think abt it actualli..we used to b *loggerheads*lol..wheneva he sEEs mi in sch,he'll run away or cover his face wi a face.(i so scary mehz)haha..he used to think i am a big eyed freak,n i used to think he is a freak too..lol
howeVa,that was in e past,fate poked fun of us at that time.in e end,we r here where we nvr tot we wld b in e past..he used to treat mi quite *bad* when we jus started out.i rem that he went *missing* fer 2 weeks..din even go to sch..i was so worried n upset...he used to b iresponsible towards mi n our relationship..but not now..
evriday seems like a new begginning fer us..we;re nvr tired abt eachother..e more i c him,the more i wan to see him n yearn fer him...he's mi "punching bag"when i am down,mi secret diary..lolx...
w/o him,mi life would b short of a missing jigsaw puzzle..he make mi life so wonderful n complete...w/o him,i'll lose mi direction in life..thanks fer being mi *lighthouse*..always there to guide mi...
thanks fer ssacrificing ur precious beloved darling badminton practices 4 mi(sumtimes)...but i noe i am far more SUPERior then that...hahah..i bhb...okok..
(to b continued)part 1

unforgetable...

2004-08-26T19:27:00.000-07:00

evritin was like a dream..a dream that i hope would last fereva nn nvr wake up..tad day met mi ex..went amk central buy little fishie fer his little meimei..so sweet..then we took bus swnt bishan park..it was a cold day..he said to go there n chat..then i said ok..long time nvr see him le..then we sat there from around 8 to 930pm...nutin much..but i'll nvr 4get this day..we chat n had fun..sumtimes e atmosphere jus feel so tensed up or gone quiet all of a sudden..i dunno wat to say..haha..then when we went home..it started pourinf as we made our way out of bishan park..e rain was veri beri big..then i told him he could run if he wanted but i am not goin to..we were totalli drenced in e rain but we jus kept on walking..whilst others seek shelter..lookin at us as if we came frm outer space..then out of the blue,he held mi hands..i nvr asked y .n we jus kept on goin..e rain beat down mercilessly but we jus kept goin..he wanted to wlak mi home but i offered to wait 4 taxi wif him instead cus i dunwan him see mi shed mi tears as i walked home..when i reached home,i was all wet like nobody's business..mi mum was petrifiefd n asked mi to go bath but i didnt wan to..not bcos i was lazy..jus tat i *did not bear to *wash away e rain..or e memories..hope e rain would wake mi up also..so ironic..been tryin real hard to ferget him cos he hurt mi e most once..yet now i dunwan to ferget..haha..life's full of ironies n contradicitons

hmm..

2004-08-22T22:33:00.000-07:00

so swey recentli..been reli pretty moody n unhappy..i tink sum guys..i m not referin to all..are jus some bullshit idiots..so r their frenz..there's actaulli this *hippo n frenz* compani in mi sch..they sucks to the core..actualli called mi hp n scolded mi today fer no reson..n they think they r e coolest n most handsum guys in sch..oh mi clas.s..i cannot blieve it..onli noe how to criticize n luff at others when they dun hav the quality themsleve.s..l..if i noe voodoo,i'll sure turn thm into hipps n werewolves n chickenm,,

hmm..

2004-08-19T18:43:00.000-07:00

hmm...m i reli Hapi?i dunnoo..alot of tings happmed recentli..n i am moody most of the time..i guessed so..sianz...no motivation to study yet tho A levels is nearing....dunno when will i eva get the motivation..sch SEems to b Gettin morE n More sIanz..
wEll..at leaSt i got a buncH of daRLin sWeetie frenz to cheer up mi Life ..n to DEpend on:
1.mELing Aka nicoLe:mi bEst n no1 darlin in sRjc..our Meetin is a *miraculous happening*tat shall always remain in mi meMeories..i always thank Gog fer giVin mi her..sum1 to shaRe mi life n thingS with..sum1 to go home n cum to sch wi evrIday no mateEr rain or shinE>..sum1 to lend mi a ShouldEr or listenin eaR when i NeeD one..sum1 to tELl mi *lame* jokeS jus to make mmi smiLe when i Am sad...sum1 to go Out wi..to hang around with..sum1 jus to b there 4 mi..we haV maNi maNi tingS in CoommmoOn..n i tink 1 is that we'rre born *stubbOrn* n serious in love ba..that's y we 're mostli troubled by affairs of the heart n by *guys*not naming WHO..haha..but i am Glad shE"s always theRe 4 mi..i dunhaV to open mi mouTh to tell her wAt i wan n Wat i am thinkking Most of the Time..i think She rEli undErstandS mi..i think this kiN of fRen is once in Mani Mani lifetimes...ThAnk YOu..u Made mi Life ExTraordinaRy...
CinDy aka AuntIe Lim:aunTie lim coS she:s always slow..slow at eatin..slow in toilet etc..i dun hav to elaborate on..haha..altho onli kNown heR this Yr..hmm..n less or near to half a yr ba..she's also ant sWeetie that has madE an impact in mi Life..mi n her n meilin R the *ing*haha..WAnit*inG*,MeiL*ing*,n mi Chair l*ing*...haha..3 of us always hangs aroun togetheR..gossip together..sharin abt our *love affairs* together,,,we sharE a similaR boaT..or should i say the same boat..thus.,,we must trY together not to let our ship sink...lolx...auntie lim is a goody fren,,,sum1 also to share mi weals n woes with ,play around with..lolx...listen to mi comaplains n naggin..haaha...beat each other's backside...luff liek mad together..eTc
all in all.both of them r mi bEsTEst pals in sRjc..thank u Fer makin a d"Ifference in mi life..i love u all..
and also..
puifAng:the *dajie* in our clas..givin gd aDviCEs.mature n responsible.n she lufFs beri *funnili*..haha...hope she can b with tarzan soon..;p;x
hoonching:the *practical future carreerrr woman*haha..always so LAme..n her Catch phrase is *hello,wat's ya prob*..lolx..shE:s always so *cute*..she May look sTern sumtimeS but shE is a Good fren hu can offeR advices at times..hope she"l marry the PresideNt of sWATCh compani..then bcum a Taitai that changes swATCh evriday..haha
jiaWen:the One wif no sCandaLs.haha.also ant *big sis* of our clas...sumtimes certain things n expression she says reli Givs us a surpRzie..hehe..hope i can b as studious as her..
ann:the CheerRy sWeetie in our cLass,,the onli one *attached* i tink..lolx...hehee..always *entertainin* ppl wi her Bubbly chaRacter...exludes a charm that no one can resists..
leSleY:ant swEEtie in our CLa.s..always pinchin PPl's backside..loxl..ahaha..she"s the onli geR thta i ';d eva kiSSed..lolx..kinda weird..(dun dare mi to do antin next time,cos i 'll do it)..haha..a;ways so *xiao niao yi ren*..os sweet.so cute....if i am a guy..i'll definitely fall fer her..haha
lingli:the quiet n blur blur one..lolx..but she's a frenli n helpful ger..reli good at chasing stars...lolx..hope she cna find her bf soon..mab wang ren fu look a like..hahah..
i think i'll wirte until here cos i tink it's bloody long..jus wanna tell u all :i LOve u all..

long weekend...

2004-08-10T18:41:00.000-07:00

hmm..practically spent most of it awAy sleEepin..mi new found hobbY..hahaa..howeva..sun wEnt palaWan beach wi cinDY,meilinh n ed..had a fun time..howeva i had a horrible time on e monoRail..i am afraid of heights u see..altho it's not veri high..i tink mi heart jumped a few times..so nvr eva get mi to go Escape.. i'll jus play those games thatds meant fer kid.s.those water pistol games that can win bear breas..*hugZ*lolx...hmm..played *merry go round* in e water..so fun..happi til i keep screamin..lolx..at 1st quite afraid to go in to e water cos i almost kena drowned b4 once..got e toopig phobia...so fun...i nvr knew chair could actulaii *sWim*...lolx..sad that i lost mi ankLEt..no more *lingling longnlong* wherevA i go le..perhaps i kicked too much in e water..sad...but overall..i had fun...we had fun..lolX>..went home with mi skin burnin like mad..1st time i weren that *fair skinned* afterall le..but e sun quite effective ah.burn til mi face the skin abit peelin n dry le..lolx..wil go again nex time..but hope they'll attach sit belts to the monorails..haha

sunDAy bluEs..

2004-08-01T21:59:00.000-07:00

had a sucky day ysDAe..slept most of mi DAy away in the aftErNNonnn...ate quite alot of junKs..reli mooDy recenTLy..cRied to sleep last nite...did gp til 10 plus then go home..sucKy..toopiG presentAtion...
waited fer sumboDy's call..made mi cry..he dint care...he said i was childish n unreasonable...wat abt him?he onli cared abt himself..when i knew abt his prob..i try to enquire frm mi frenz wat act happened.e...wat the ....he's so so so selfish..hu does he thinks he is?yes.he is a mooMMy's boy..but i dint mind..he suCks...he should b back in his mUmmY's arm..now n foreva..always so sHeltered....in her embrace...unknown or unaware of e outSiude woRld..when will he eva grOW..?perhaps neVer,,,i dun care animore..i am too hurt to caRe...if i dun care,y did i bother to think abt him >?i think ii am an idiot...

creStfallen

2004-07-29T19:37:00.000-07:00

been reli veri veri swey n emotional and ultra sad these few days ...
hmm..this mornin..meiling looked veri veri sick n pale..first time see her lidat..so soworried..feel so helpless..acc her to sickbay then went fer econs..couln relli concnetrate///...
then went see her..then act wanan acc her home cus her parents working..but philips tan say cannot..then wait fer her papa cum..hope she'l b fine soon..
whent to see *his* profile jus now..he is ATTACHED again..tried to scroll thru all his testi..reli dunno hu he is with now..sad...issit the *rosE* agaiN>?or issiT sum1 new?i dunno..i reli dunno...y has he been isolatin mi?treatin mi as if i am a mere stranger...i noe i am writin full of typo but i dun care..i am jus too overli emotional to b in good sense now..
one yr plus le..he nvr contact mi..been tryin to find out how he has been doin thru his frenstewr profile..sumtimes i'll b quite happi to see his status as single..but when it isnt,,tears start to well,,,y am i still so uselss>..i dread this kind of feelins..a levels cuming...yet i stil can reli let go...i miSS him..i hope he noeS i do..but i noe he doeSnt..i guess he wans mi out of his life...forVEr,,,not even as a PuRe fren...
y is liFE so suCKy..
life alreAdy suckS when he Left..
y does it sTill haunts mi when evritn's oveR?
is bein frenZ after a breakup alsWAys so difF?
god..tell mi wat to do...
mi heart died once..for *him*>..
pls enliven it....
hopefulli thru *him* again..
pls cure mi of mi wishFUl thinking..

sad

2004-07-28T22:38:00.000-07:00

this few days quite swey..ystdae pretty happi at first one..then at nite *sum1*made mi veri upset...ran home crying..mi heart sank..taoyan ....
watched i robots..think its not nice one..sucky..suntec so cold..went after sch...so tired..went home sad n furios..slept..
hapi tat 1st time pass chinese test ...lolx..finalli...i got study k..i got read 1 hour k..prod of mi self cus 1st time study chinese..lolx...
eh..dunno wat to write..so sad..life 's so unpredictable

SweY

2004-07-25T22:33:00.000-07:00

swey swey swEy..always so swEy..ysdate got the volunterr falgday tiny>.woke up late..haha.then kena posted to eunos..so pathetic..so little ppl..but i gav mi best..quite proud of mi "earningS",which is the donattions..pretty fed up..got a bunch of malay kids..sec 4 lidat under mi..all dunno go where slack.,.in the end came back wi empty donation bags..never mind...then keep makin alot of noise..veri xiaswey..then act must bring them back to simei mrt to report but they refused..sad...
hmm..mon..today..sad..veri moody whole day..y r there so mani hypocrites n jerkS around..no mood to go fer lessoonnn...skipped alot of lessons...ended up in sick bay..maybe mi heart n mind is reli sick..
frenS fRenS frenS...wat on earth is that supposed to mean?
yes i got alot of frenz..but few close ones...meiling,cindy.evelyn ,yvon....can count witin one palm one lehz
i love them lots..cherish them lots..they lit up mi life..
the rest of the ppl lehz..cum on la..they wouldn do anitin that is not beneficial to them..so practicall..
hypocritS..backstabbErs..apple polisheRs...all in prevalence..y is theearth goin on liudat?
y cant ppl jus treat each other sincerely?y mus there b backstabbin?
dunno wat to say le..reli pek ckek now...
hope i dun explode..i am a docile volccano...but a SCAry one when i erUpt..lolx

sunday..sat..

2004-07-18T22:12:00.000-07:00

ystedae so sianz..stayed home e entire day..waitin fer ppl's call..dun liek to wait as i hate lonelinez n boredom but got no choice..when i say i'll wait,i';ll reli sit therre n wait..n do nutin else..jus like a fooll..so pls dun make mi wait nex time..esp waitin in vain...*_*....had a tirin but fun sat wif meiling..went shoppin e entire day..been beri long since we last did that..maybe a week...walked e whole of orchard practicalli..legs wanna break le..waitied fer that cheeseng hor.,.fer one hour..oh mi god..he;s always late..wait til i no energy scold him le..lolx..spent til i wanna broke le..bought a shirt from bods body knits..another one from ming boutique..i like it..mature n nice..lolx..bought new contact lens..plu ssolution twin pack ..bauch n lombs..comes wif a cutie contact lense doggy case..i cant resist cute stuff..ya..bought hair clips n this n that..i tink i mus reli saev up fer mi new hp lez...went home shagged..took neoprint wif meiling...quite nice e collour..new machine at cineleisure..nicE>..
meiling dressed in veri earth colours..low cut v necked n racer back top wor..*sExY*...heheh...mi?jus a plain white top n esprit beige skirt..normal..i look plain beside her i think,even wif a bit of make up on..hahaha..(ya la i vain la)..hahah..dunno wat to write le...

RidicULOus

2004-07-15T21:42:00.000-07:00

hmm..finalli can write again today..now free period in sch..ysatdae a level chinese oral sucks..1stli,i'm too nervous..as i was readin e passage,i got faster n faster..n durin the conversaation,i cocked evriting up..i told e examiners the quetions that they asked was RIDICULOUS..how could i?sad..e entire sessiionn lasted less then 3 mins n i was asked to go..sad..reli swey ystdae..,mornin woke up got sorethroat..mi worst nitemare fer oral..then cum out of e hs,nearli sprain mi ankle again..swey..the previous nite was the instrumental performance at victoria concert hall..wow..the performance was great..i gave in mi evritin..evrione looked prettty..jiawen n hoonching were gorgeous..evrione looked jus so different..meiling looked diff also..1st time i ever saw her put on full makeup..that includes foundation..i sang til mi throat was breaking..it was wonderful to b able to perform there again after two years..choir is mi life..singin is mi passioonnn.,,hahah..n hor..e sweeteck,.so farnie..his makeup even REDDER then ours..luff mi feet off..lolx..nearli bashed him..heard the worst sarcasm frm him..he said "EYES NOT NICE DUN ACT PRETTY...waliew..thats a total insult..i pulled him fiercely by his collar..lolx..hahha..then i told him..u think wear adidas schoes will make u more handsum mehz?lolx..hahah..ok la..in e end,meiling's anunt n uncle drove us home..thanks fer the ride!mi feet hurts like hell frm the toopig heels..lolx

meMory...

2004-07-15T18:53:00.000-07:00

time SparEs no one,
leavin no trails behind as each day is gone.
wat 's left r known as memories,
which will be gone in centuries.
e past that we once shared,
continues to haunts me with each tear i shed.
will i eveR wake up?
evritin w/o u jus suX..
(i shall write til here today)...to b continued..lalla

sianz

2004-07-11T22:23:00.000-07:00

now at library slackin away as usual..havin monday blues..sianz..still dunnoo how to use this bloger thingy..or how to change e template..i'm sort of a silly dumb in this kind of ting..the toopig thunder so loud..rainin so big now..i'm so scared..but cannot show..cus in library..ppl will luff de..haha..had a slacky weekend..that day sat 's rehearsal drill til wanna no voise le..hopefulli wed's performance would b a success..hoepefulli after taht mi voice is not affected,if not thur's a level chi oral i die le..no voice..experienced in sec4 that time b4..the o level one..i could have gotten beetter grades insterd of a merit..jus bcos of a stupid sorethroat that was reli bad..i had to repeat e 1st sentence at least over ten times n stil no voice came out..the examiner even had to offer mi her bottle of mineral water twice..wat a shame..haha

hmm..

2004-07-08T18:37:00.000-07:00

hmm...ysdate had a tirin day in sch..econs extra til 630..reach home so tired le...then slack here n there fer a while then oror le..nutin special..listenin to mi new found fav cd(ocean's)
on bed..waitin fer people to reply mi msg..i seldom listen chinese dongs de..mostli eng..but bcos of *him*,i got the cd..jus posted him his bdae card today..his bdae on 11th july..miss him alot..hope he's doin fine in his sch..(mac ite)i tink..dunno if he still hangs around tiong bahru arcade after sch..hope he's doin great..n hopefully he will reciv mi hand made card on time..

LouSy daY

2004-07-08T01:36:00.000-07:00

hmm,ystdaE 7th julY,stayed back in sch fer the instrumental thingy reheaRsal..so long..stay until aroun 9..waseh//the john teo hor..i bo way kong..he so arrogant n like he beri professional lidat..mi foot..music director somemore..wahaha/./.dunno where he came frm ..finally evrtIn end le then i staraightway ccalled *him*.cus today is his bdae..wanna gimm him his bdae presdent thingy..called his hp ,he nvr pick up,as expected..called his hs..iaskd him free ant..can cum down his hs awhile?i go find him..i say jus a min,he said no..iwas so sad..today is his bdae,as well as the day that we had broken up fer one yr..i dun understand y he is still avoidin mi.y is he so unfair to mi.?haiz..sad...i loved him once the most..yet he hurt mi e most..til now..also..y cant we jus stay as frenZ?haiyo..dun write le...sad like hell when i tink of it..when i asked him how he was,he told mi not to bother..wat the...mi heart sank into the deepest pool ..i tink even beyond the bounderies of hell if there is any...